For the Love of Fugaku hamstyle
by Hammy Uchiha
Summary: Sai's been hanging out around his brother's house...again. A pregnant Sakura has had almost as much as she can take. For the love of Fugaku!


I've been working on this for too long. Anyways you may have (but probably not) seen there are two other stories with this title its meh two friends, actually friend and sister and we came up with a little contest **involving Fugaku calling his grandchildren whippersnappers**... this is my version.

So please could you give it an out of 10 rating when you're done then make sure to check out **Uchiha of the Desert** 's story as well as **The Kunai Monster **'s, so we may come to decide something of a winner.**Total:**Fugaku: 18,Whippersnapper: 9

Enough unneccesary information, please enjoy yourself. Read and Review and rate so Sai's abs don't have to come and speak with you.

Note: I don't own Naruto, that is Kishi's pleasure.

I digress...

**For the Love of Fugaku (Hammy Style)**

**By Hammy Uchiha**

He was, to Sai's mind, the perfect image of a soon to be father. The way he came through the door weary and worried. The way he tossed his coat aside and let out a tired sigh. Sai caught that too on his sketchpad. Sasuke was far too distracted to feel the presence of his brother as he hid doing sketches.

It had been a year and a half ago Sasuke and Sakura had gotten married and Sai had been officially evicted from the house, but Sai lingered(or more specifically wouldn't leave)…much to the distaste and anger from Sasuke, who threw Sai by force out of his own house usually more than twice a day.

Sai now watched from under a table as Sasuke walked into the living room and bent over the armchair to kiss Sakura's forehead. Sai sketched that down as well and began to look for an escape rout. With both Sasuke, and now Sakura awake, home, and active they would find him. They always did, he always dropped his guard for that one crucial moment and it was too late.

Sakura yawned hugging her pregnant belly. Sasuke was kicking off his shoes onto the rug.

"I feel so ugly," groaned Sakura, "I feel like a walking blob."

"No, you're beautiful," answered Sasuke pulling her up out of the arm chair. Sai got his pencil ready for Sasuke to say something loving.

"You're just saying that," she said looking up into his dark onyx eyes. "You're so revolted by my fatness, you feel the need to lie."

"I kid you not," said Sasuke smiling beautifully at her. "You are the most beautiful pregnant woman I've ever seen," he said and kissed her. The sound of the lead from Sai's pencil breaking caused the two to break apart and Sasuke return to what he had been doing in the first place. He unzipped his jounin vest with a yawn and tossed that on the chair then discreetly he opened a window to let in a soft evening breeze.

"He's here, isn't he?" he asked Sakura just soft enough for her to hear. (Sasuke shouldn't have bothered, Sai wasn't paying attention.)

"Mmhhmm," replied Sakura nodding. "He's been here a long time; I didn't even try to get rid of him on my own. He respects you and I'm in no condition to lift him up," she said stealthily, Sasuke nodded quietly.

"How about pancakes for dinner?" he asked her in a normal voice. "My treat,"

"Mmm, pancakes with warm maplely syrup," she said licking her lips. "That sounds delicious."

Quietly Sai adjusted position, his attention finally caught. _Pancakes? Without me? Niisan is so cruel._ Silently he headed for a window Sasuke recently opened, if he could get outside, he could come around to the front door and then they'd have to let him in for pancakes... _Pancakes! Pancakes! Pancakes!_ (He's too obsessed to be reasonable about random open windows.) As the couple headed for the kitchen and Sasuke pulled out the frying pan, Sai made his move for the window, and just as he was half way out the window, it came down trapping him.

"Agh!" he cried all thoughts of the delicious pancakes vanishing in a painful thump from the window slamming down on him. Brandishing the frying pan Sasuke came and Sakura watched from a distance.

"Where is it, Sai?" demanded Sasuke quietly, his voice full of malice.

"What? Where is what?" asked Sai innocently from the other side of the window.

"Don't give me that crap, your sketchbook or whatever it is you've been doing," said Sasuke waving the pan threateningly. Sai could now see the frying pan, and he grew nervous. Desperately Sai tried to wriggle out of the window, but it was no use.

"I don't have it," he cried.

"Then where'd you put it?"

"I don't have it!" Sai insisted. "I didn't bring one!"

"Lies," replied Sasuke getting a better grip on the frying pan.

"Please don't hit me," begged Sai. (He's stuck and he knows it.)

"Tell me where it is and I won't have to," said Sasuke threateningly.

"No!"

Sasuke whacked Sai soundly and his brother fell out the window. Sasuke slammed down the window and locked it.

"You lock the doors?" he asked Sakura.

"Yep, while you were interrogating him," replied Sakura with a sigh. "Will he really ever stop doing this?"

"He swore he'd stop after the baby comes," grumbled Sasuke heading back to the kitchen examining the frying pan to check if it was damaged. "You know what? I'm in the mood for pancakes, that good with you?" With a soft groan of pain, Sakura sat down.

"Yup, that's fine," she said as Sasuke washed off the pan and then got a bowl out of the cupboard. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Sai peering in through the window. Sasuke smirked slightly pulling out the box of pancake mix. Sai's face was pressed to the window now. Sasuke shook the box in front of the window as Sai pressed harder.

"Niiiiiisan!" his whine could faintly be heard. Carefully the older Uchiha measured out the mix to the pained looks of Sai and the amusement of Sakura. "Pleeeease!" begged Sai pounding on the window as Sasuke mixed up the milk, eggs and mix. The pan was hot now and Sai could only watch as Sasuke spooned out the large pancakes.

It was pure torture when finally they had finished cooking and stacked nicely on a plate Sasuke set them down in front of Sakura before grabbing his own plate. They sat in good view of the window and then poured on the maple syrup. Sai's face was pressed to the window.

"Sakura!" he begged, but she ignored him taking slowly bites visibly savoring every bite. After several pancakes had been devoured Sakura looked to Sasuke. Sai was drooling on their window.

"Have we punished him enough?" she asked. Sasuke carefully licked the syrup off his fingers.

"I'm getting sick of eating so slow," he said, "so I guess that's enough." He got up and pulled the curtains over the window. Sai's pounding efforts on the window picked up again and he could be heard crying in agony outside the window as they finished dinner in silence.

"Saku," asked Sasuke when they had finished, as he picked up his plate to wash it and reached for hers as well.

"Hmm?" she asked getting up to help him.

"There's something I have to tell you," he said rolling up the sleeves of his jounin shirt as he turned on the water in the sink.

"What is it?" she asked hesitantly.

"They've called me out," he said. "It's a long distance mission," he said quietly.

"But…the baby," began Sakura. Sasuke scrubbed on the sticky syrup calmly.

"I'll be there!" he insisted turning to look her in the eyes, "But I can't just leave you here alone…"

"No," she said before he even suggested it. Outside it sounded like Sai was throwing himself against the house.

"Niiiiiiiiisaaaaaann!"

Sasuke turned to her and took her hands in his wet ones.

"I'm going to ask Sai to come over here to stay with you,"

"Naruto, ask Naruto instead," she said.

"I already did," said Sasuke, "but he's so busy he wouldn't be able to be around enough, and Sai's gonna end up here anyways…"

"NO!"

"He's my brother Sakura," said Sasuke, "He's one of the few people I would trust to look after you." Sakura was giving Sasuke her pouting face. He had to turn away to avoid its controlling power. He violently scrubbed the plate and waited for her to relent, but even as he was rinsing it off she was still giving him the look.

"I'm leaving in the morning," he said quietly.

"Sasuke," she protested as he set down the plate and turned to walk off. He couldn't look her in the eye, couldn't stand to see the pain there. Her hand caught on his shirt. He turned to face her. "Don't walk away from me," she said softly staring at the floor the tears dripping down his face. It hit Sasuke how immature he was acting at that moment. He reached out a hand to touch her face.

"I'm sorr…"

There then came the loud sound of what must have been Sai throwing himself against the door and the door breaking.

"Why niisan, why?!?!" he wailed from the spot where the side door had been. Sasuke slapped his forehead already grumbling beneath his breath.

"Sai….!"

Sakura was thrown full force into the waking world by a tremendous crash from the kitchen. _Sasuke!_ With a groan she rolled herself out of bed and headed for the kitchen, fearing Sasuke had fallen and broken something, or worse, hurt himself. She got to the kitchen to see it was only Sai cleaning up the remnants of what had been a glass mixing bowl.

"Good morning hag," greeted Sai with a smile seeing her in the doorway. Sakura looked from him to the shards of the bowl before turning around, returning to the bed and going back to sleep. She slept for a good deal of the morning while Sai tried to entertain himself.

After he had cleaned up the glass from the bowl and had thoroughly made sure none of it was still on the floor, he went and got out his sketchpad from where he had hidden it. All the sketches were still there so Sai knew Sasuke had been unsuccessful at trying to find it. He then sat down at the kitchen table with a set of colored pencils Sasuke had left him to entertain himself with so he wouldn't bother Sakura.

Sai, humming to himself, began to shade in the picture he had done the day before of the sleeping Sakura, her hands folded together on top of her pregnant belly. He figured he had been coloring for a good two and a half hours when Sakura emerged from her den at last. (Sai notes how much she reminds him a hungry mother bear or maybe something more like a hungry komodo dragon…) Sai closed the sketch pad as Sakura carefully entered the kitchen.

"Just so you know," she said to him as she pulled down a plate out of the cupboard, "if I step on a piece of glass and get it stuck in my foot, I will personally strangle you."

"Okay," said Sai cheerfully as Sakura lined up the bread on her plate. It felt like a normal day except Sai wasn't hiding, doing sketches of her, he was out and about breaking bowls and causing pain.

"Can I have one?" asked Sai as Sakura made herself a sandwich.

"No, if anyone should be making anyone sandwiches it should be you," she said taking a bite out of the sandwich and fixing her glare on the shards of her broken bowl in the trash can.

"Why?" asked Sai still watching her from the other room.

"Sasuke asked you to take care of me, right?" she asked him. He nodded. "Making me a sandwich is taking care of me." Sai cocked his head at her.

"Why?"

"Ugh…" she grumbled, "It just had to be you…didn't it?"

"Of course," answered Sai. (He has no idea what she's talking about over in the kitchen.)

After lunch she went outside to walk around and of course Sai followed her with his sketchpad.

"Why do you feel the need to make sketches of me?" she demanded as Sai quickly jotted something down on his paper as she sat down on the deck and looked out at the garden, her bare feet dangling above the ground. Sai didn't answer. Sakura vaguely wondered where Sasuke was, and why, above all, Tsunade had to give Sasuke the mission. Grumpily she got up and went back inside. Sai followed her again.

"Why are you following me?" she demanded.

"I can't leave you in or outside alone," he said picking up a note off the counter and waving it in her face. Sakura snatched Sasuke's note out of Sai's hand. _Sasuke made him a whole list of things he could and could not do?_ She didn't know whether to feel grateful that Sasuke had made sure Sai would not try to blatantly bother her or angry he had put down to not leave her in the house all alone, or outside all alone.

Fed up, she lay down on the couch and took a nap, while Sai lay on the floor still coloring. After Sai grew bored of that he left the room with absolute stealth and dug into a box Sasuke kept in the closet. It was a box full of family photos that Sasuke usually was guarding with his life.

Sai pulled it out of the closet (He ignored the 'Do Not Mess With 'that means you, Sai!'' sign) and opened the lid. The box reeked of dust and Sai had stopped coughing violently and his eyes had stopped watering enough for him to see, he pulled out the photos one by one. Here was one of the whole family, Fugaku and Mikoto and Itachi and of course niisan. There was one of Itachi ruffling Sasuke's hair, who was smiling. The photo itself looked as though it had been crumpled up several times, but eventually flattened out and put back in the frame. There was one of Fugaku and Mikoto possibly on their wedding day; here one of what appeared to be Itachi taking his first steps. Sai pulled one out of Fugaku lying on the living room floor sleeping and right beside him, judging by the hair, was baby Sasuke.

Even as Sai looked at his family's memories, he couldn't help but feel contempt for these people, those parents, who had gotten rid of him, because he wasn't Sharingan-positive, because the main family couldn't have two Sharingan geniuses and one without the Sharingan at all. Sai's grip tightened on the picture of Sasuke and Fugaku, until his knuckles were white and his teeth clenched. A silent feeling of hate and neglect and a hundred feelings seethed through his whole self as he looked at their happiness without him, without regrets.

His rage tore the picture and Sai had to stop there and look at the two scraps of his brother's memories. Sai stood up and walked away from the box. He was so dazed by his burst of anger that he had forgotten where he was, and what he was supposed to be doing. Sakura's soft breathing as she slept reminded him, or actually more importantly the note she was holding which clearly read: Do NOT dig through my pictures and rip them in half. (Sai is certain that Sasuke knew this was going to happen.)

Sai turned around and ran back to do damage control, if he hurried he could fix it before Sakura woke up and saw him. Carefully Sai taped the picture back together and then lifted up some heavy albums to hide it under. He set it down and noticed another picture that looked as though it had slid out of one of the albums. Unable to help himself Sai picked it up and turned it over. It was a picture of two babies so much alike he couldn't tell who was who. Sai wondered about it as he let the albums slide down and rescuing the taped picture. He put the taped one into the pile he had got it from where it would be less noticeable and then he pushed the box back into the closet still holding the baby picture.

"Sai?" came a groan from the living room. Sai walked in looking dazed. Sakura was watching from the couch.

"What's that?" she asked accusingly.

"What's what?" returned Sai innocently.

"Baka! That picture you're holding!"

"I'm not holding a picture," lied Sai running from the scene, an action which he knew the pregnant woman could not easily match. He retreated to the kitchen still staring at the picture. If he had been thinking it was by some mistake or fluke that Itachi had confused him for another person. If he had some how deep inside believed he wasn't actually related to Sasuke or any Uchiha, his fears were put to rest (not saying that Sai had been thinking that.)

"Sai!" groaned Sakura angrily. Sai pushed the picture into his pocket for further consult with the person he trusted most and picked up some cash Sasuke had left him on the counter. He entered the living room.

"Sai, Sasuke told you not to dig through his pictures!" she scolded him.

"It's not a picture," he told her waving the money.

"What is that?"

"Money," said Sai simply. "For ice cream, I think," he said. Sakura checked the note from Sasuke to find that indeed the money had been left in the case that Sakura was craving ice cream and Sai had gone bankrupt in some freak poker match, had lost everything gambling with Tsunade, had sold all his possessions and his soul to a certain man named Orochimaru or one of a million other listed reasons.

"I can't walk to the ice cream shop," she told him.

"And I'm not going to carry you, you fat hag," replied Sai causing Sakura's face to redden in anger. She pulled at her hair in rage at her helpless position. She just wanted to hurt him…so…bad…

"If I didn't have the baby to think about I would rip you to shreds," she threatened him from the couch. Sai picked up the phone a safe distance from Sakura; he dialed one of the emergency numbers Sasuke had listed.

"Hello?"

"Naruto, Sakura needs your help," said Sai. The person on the other end left the phone hanging and Sai hung up. Sakura was still glaring at him.

"What did you just do?"

"Delivery service," said Sai. There came a pounding on the door at that instant and Sai leapt up to answer it. It was Naruto out of breath and very worried.

"Don't worry…" he panted stumbling, "I'll save you…. Sakura-chan…" he collapsed on the floor panting.

"She wants ice cream," said Sai dropping the money.

"Ice cream?" asked Naruto confused. He looked up past Sai to Sakura who was still sitting on the couch. "Sakura-chan?"

"Mint chip," she said to him. Naruto gave her a tired grin. "Okay,"

"I'll have chocolate," said Sai with a grin.

"Get your own," said Naruto with a grumble, getting up, "And don't call me for something like this again," he said to Sai. Sai's face fell.

"Please?" he asked Naruto giving him the puppy dog face.

"Ugh! Fine!" cried Naruto and headed out. Sai did his victory dance, while Sakura growled something about a pancake obsessed idiot.

"You feeling better yet?" Sai asked Ino later that evening while Naruto had dinner with Sakura. Ino had been in bed for two weeks with an unidentifiable illness, most likely just a bad cold. According to Tsunade she was no longer contagious so Sai had been visiting her as often as he could. Ino sniffled for emphasis before answering.

"A little," she said still feeling very crappy. "How's Sakura, has the baby come yet?"

"Not yet," said Sai, he showed her the drawing he had finished coloring in that afternoon. "That was yesterday," he explained.

"Forehead girl's swollen up like a balloon," giggled Ino giving the picture back to Sai after several moments.

"Look what I found," he said pulling the photo out of his pocket. Ino looked at the photo for a minute before she realized who the twins were.

"Oooooohhhh you two are so adorable!" she squealed in delight looking from Sai to the picture and back again. "You're both so bald I can't tell you apart," she laughed. "I bet it'll be that way when you both get old. So bald you're not able to be deciphered as being Sai or being Sasuke."

"Yeah…" muttered Sai, still thinking about the photos in the box. (He had stopped listening to Ino after the squeal about their adorable-ness.) He wondered if maybe his parents hadn't had a choice. That maybe some elder in the clan had ordered it. Fugaku the father wouldn't have just thrown away one of his sons because they weren't Sharingan-positive, right? Even as Sai was thinking this the phone by Ino's bedside rang. Ino answered.

"Hello?" she called. The voice on the other side was frantic. "Right, right," answered Ino as quick as she could to keep up with the other speaker. "Sai," she said hanging up and giving him a smile. "That was Naruto, it's time."

"Right," said Sai getting up and stuffing the photo back in his pocket. He kissed her hand and ran out the door.

_Would Fugaku call him a whippersnapper? _

Sai couldn't get it out of his head. It had been spawned in his mind when in the wee hours of the morning, shortly before dawn, Sasuke burst through the hospital doors, with a swarm of nurses running after him, trying to stop him. They were having no luck at stopping him until Sai leapt from nowhere and tackled Sasuke. The two brothers rolled on the floor struggling until Sai managed to successfully pin Sasuke. Blood dripping from Sasuke's lip from a well aimed punch from Sai, Sasuke tried to struggle, but he was tired and beaten.

"Let me go Sai," he grunted trying again to knock Sai out of the firm hold he had on him. "I swore I'd be there!" he cried fighting but not succeeding. The nurses had gathered in a circle around the two. Finally they managed to convince Sasuke to hold off a minute and clean up on the valid cause that he might make the babies in the maternity ward ill. Sasuke had hardly left the village in pursuit of his mission when he knew that if he carried it out, he wouldn't make it back in time.

He had sworn to Sakura, on his parent's graves to be there and he was there. Sai had never seen his brother so intensely caring about something. The picture of Fugaku and Sasuke came back to Sai's mind, and he wondered if Fugaku had acted just like Sasuke was acting now.

Sasuke had made it in time to be with Sakura at that important moment in both their lives. There was a bandage on his cheek and both his upper arms were wrapped from his full force flight back to the village and from his scuffle with Sai, but he was there, right beside Sakura when it was time for the child to come. They gripped hands together and hung in there.

_Would Fugaku call him a whippersnapper?_

Sai eyed the small pink child from a distance. He was such a small little baby with such little features. Sai couldn't say who he looked more like, his mother or his father. He pulled the picture out of his pocket where it was still resting and then looked from himself and Sasuke to the little child marveling at how much alike they look.

Sai dared to get no closer than he already was, fearing he would break the bubble of content that surrounded his brother and his family. But even as Sai watched his brother sitting on the edge of the bed, his arm around Sakura, looking with a look a warm love on the small babe the thought grew stronger.

_Would Fugaku call him a whippersnapper?_

He wanted, no, **_needed_** to know the answer. Sasuke had told him very little of their father, of Fugaku, and when he had spoken about his father it had been forced. Sai had cornered him, Sasuke had tried to wriggle out of the question, to avoid it, but he couldn't run. He had given Sai a half answer to the questions of their father and while Sai was pondering it Sasuke had slipped away and made a run for it. The older Uchiha was in a good mood, if Sai wanted to know the answer to his burning question, he would have to ask it now. As Sai was about to ask he heard the crying of someone outside the door.

"Saaaaaiiiiii," came Naruto's whine. "It's my tuuurrrrn," he cried pressing himself so hard against the door that one might have thought he was trying to liquidate himself and squeeze between the cracks of the door. "Saaaiii, pleeeeeease," he whined. Sai doubted Naruto had good intentions. _He's probably wanting to comment how much the baby 'looks like Sakura and that that is a good thing because no child should have to suffer looking like butt ugly Sasuke.'_ Sai was fine with that, he would say it himself, but there always was the issue of Sasuke beating on him, plus Sai wasn't cruel enough to say something like that to a new father.

"Sai it is his turn, leave and let Naruto in," said Sasuke looking at his younger twin brother, his tone of voice and absolute calmness testified to the incredibly good mood he was in. Sai looked to Sasuke and hoped he wouldn't shirk from the question about Fugaku as Sasuke had a tendency to do.

"Sasuke, would Fugaku call him a whippersnapper?" asked Sai. Sasuke's first thought was stupid enough to wonder who Sai was talking about. He stared at his brother in confusion. Calling his father Fugaku was what had thrown him off.

"What kind of question is that?" demanded Sasuke glaring at Sai, the daze he had been in vanished like a thin fog.

"I need to know," replied Sai. Sasuke was still glowering at Sai. _Has he no shame?_ Sasuke's mouth opened and closed several times, but no words could he find to answer Sai's bizarre question.

"Yes," said Sakura softly, her eyes still closed. (Sai hadn't even thought she was awake.) "He'd ruffle his hair and say 'There's my little whippersnapper,'" she said with a smile. Vaguely Sasuke wished his father had actually been that sort of person.

"Oh," said Sai, not sure whether she was telling the truth or not. He had the urge to take the picture out of his pocket and ask Sasuke if Fugaku would have called them whippersnappers.

"Saaaaaaiiiiii," came Naruto whine louder. (Was it Sai's imagination or was Naruto now clawing at the door?) "I wanna see the baby! C'mon it myyyyyy turrrrrn."

"Niisan?" began Sai, Sasuke was sick of Sai's random question.

"No Sai," he growled getting up, the good mood had vanished and the image of the frying pan flashed through Sai's mind.

"Is that really what he'd say?" persisted Sai as his older brother dragged him by the back of his shirt to the door. Sasuke opened it and Naruto fell in. The older Uchiha threw his little brother out the door and pushed the question out of his head. But it wouldn't leave.

_Would Fugaku call him a whippersnapper?_

The question lingered on long after practically everyone Sasuke had ever known in the hidden leaf village came just to catch a peek of the newest heir to the Uchiha clan as he slept in his mother's arms. It was still there as Sasuke curled up in the armchair in the hospital room for the night. The child in question, Sanosuke, was asleep in the baby care unit so Sakura could rest easily. Sasuke couldn't get comfortable in the chair as the question continued to bother him for reasons he couldn't put his finger on.

"Just relax Sasuke," whispered Sakura after Sasuke had gotten up and tried to reposition himself on the chair for the third time.

"Ugh…" grumbled Sasuke finally just throwing himself down on the chair and resolving not to move. Several long minutes passed as the question gnawed on his mind. "Saku…?" he asked after several moments. "Would he really call Sano a whippersnapper?" he asked. Sakura giggled softly to herself.

"You're still thinking about that?"

"Sai no baka," answered Sasuke in a grumble shutting his eyes. _Sai is always doing this to me, it's like he enjoys causing me pain…_ At that moment the door opened slightly and Sasuke snapped to attention drawing a kunai. A scroll was pushed in through the small opening before the door closed softly.

Sasuke eased his grip on the kunai and clicked on the bedside light. Silently he got up out of the chair. Sakura watched as cautiously Sasuke picked up the scroll, unsure what it might be. Carefully he opened the scroll and scanned it. Faintly a soft smirk curled his lip and he rolled the scroll shut.

"What is it?" asked Sakura sitting up in bed. Sasuke came over to her and sat down on the bed beside her. He rolled open the scroll to display a well drawn picture. The tallest figure was definitely Fugaku with his one arm around a shorter figure, who, judging by his hair, was definitely Sasuke with a grumpy look on his face and his other hand was ruffling the hair of the smallest figure who was making Sasuke's grumpy face in a more exaggerated manner. Scribbled in the corner was Sai's handwriting: 'There's my little whippersnappers.'

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**: ) Please Review and rate.**

**i had fun writing this...**

**-Hammy Uchiha :0**


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